Thursday, March 27, 2014



From: Marcus Andrews
Sent: Sunday, January 6, 2013 9:32 AM
To: Dane Carmichael
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Spoiled dancer

Thank you for writing me with your concern. We can revisit this issue in more detail, but I do not want you to worry for one unnecessary moment that your feelings could ever be incorrect.

Do I welcome your passion and your light? You bet that sweet, sweet ass of yours I do.

Dance well, boy.

From: Dane Carmichael
Sent: Sunday, January 6, 2013 9:33 AM
To: Marcus Andrews
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Spoiled dancer

Thank You, Master. Your message has eased my mind.


Scoring a single ticket to an off-Broadway matinee on a frigid January afternoon isn’t difficult, especially when the seat I want is far from the stage. Safe in the dark recesses of the theater, I find my hidden vantage point from which I can freely ogle my boy without jeopardizing his concentration.

The Playbill is a veritable scavenger hunt with tidbits about Dane hidden throughout. I savor the journey, thumbing through the pages one at a time, sifting through the endless ads and the schedule of upcoming shows until, finally, I reach tonight’s program. Scouring the cast listing, I identify Dane’s role and greedily tick off the musical numbers that include him. A deliberate trek through the cast bios takes me through the leads with their long lists of credentials and gratitude toward their families and Our Lord and Savior. I turn page after page, searching for the expressive brown eyes and soft layers of straight, dark hair. Will Dane’s head shot be serious or something lighter—?

And there he is.

At the bottom of page twenty-five, my heart takes an extra stutter as Dane’s radiant smile jumps right off the glossy paper. It’s a foolish sentiment—there’s no logical sequence of events that would allow it—but it feels as though Dane is smiling for me and me alone. I can’t look away from those eyes, and as I’m pinned in place by this intimate connection, I wonder how I’ll ever survive this odyssey without bursting.

The lights of St. Luke’s Theater flicker, sending last-minute patrons scurrying to their seats. The standard pre-theatre flutter is utterly eclipsed by the thrill that I’m about to see Dane in his element. The orchestra begins its overture; my eyes lift to the stage in the sweetest anticipation.

Everything is a blur of polyester as the cast performs a comical rendition of “Hot Stuff” that has the audience laughing from the first note. I’m levitating right out of my seat, searching for Dane like a greedy paparazzi looking for the money shot.  He enters the scene with a disco flourish, dressed in tight tan slacks and a garish gold button-down, topped with a long furry vest. I don’t know how he can even walk—let alone dance—in the platform shoes.

I’m struck by a hot flash worthy of my menopausal female friends; the sudden rush of heat and uncontrollable perspiration feel as though the spotlight has been trained directly on me instead of the performers. I feel ludicrously exposed; surely, everyone in the theater must surely see that I’m ablaze. Careful not to curl the edges, I fan myself with the program, drawing irritated looks from my neighbors on both sides.

Fuck you, people. You see that boy right there? He’s MINE! If you knew him as I know him, you’d be squirming and sweating and . . . hardening.

It’s a long hundred and twenty minutes before the house lights come up, and the audience jumps to its collective feet, wildly cheering as the first row of performers takes their curtain call. In the eyes of my fellow spectators, I’m an ass not to rise, but they’ve become used to my wildly inappropriate behavior by this point. The typical matinee theater-goer  is apparently not prone to involuntary gasps, overly enthusiastic laughter, and—most embarrassingly—the occasional moan; yet here I sit in a sheen of sweat, heaving exhausted breaths along with the performers I can barely make out through the mass ovation.

Waves of fresh applause, whistles, and yells of “Bravo!” crash to the stage with increasing intensity with each hand-linked group taking a bow.  I was done at line one—Dane plus a few others I never even noticed. Hell, were there other people on stage tonight? I’d have to consult my mangled program to answer that question, and yeah, I’m gonna need a new Playbill.

Not a problem, I’ve already decided, because I’m coming back for the eight o’clock show. As if there were any chance you wouldn’t.

I slip out of my row under cover of the tut-tutting patrons, my final faux-pas duly chastised. All that matters is that Dane hasn’t seen me, and I plan to keep it that way. I stop at the box office and nab a seat in Row M for later, far away enough to remain hidden, but close enough to take in some of the finer details I missed the first time around—Dane’s facial expressions, for starters.

Hopping into the first available cab, I send the driver well out of Times Square. I don’t know Dane’s routine well enough to risk staying close to the theater. In fact, I don’t know nearly enough about the boy. Here, in Dane’s world for the first time, it hits me: I don’t know where he lives or how he gets to work—though I do know he uses public transportation. I know a bit about his eating habits, but I don’t know how he takes his coffee or if he’s a tea drinker. I know he sometimes goes out with friends, but I don’t know who or where or what they like to do. Does he have a family? I don’t have a clue how he spends his free time. Does he read? Is he a Broadway junkie, spending his days off from his own show going to others? Does he play video games? Ugh, I can’t bear the pang of he’s-too-young-for-you that comes with that visual. Please, God, don’t let him play Halo.

Shake it off, Marcus. Focus on what you do know.

I know that every session seems to move us forward with leaps and bounds. Dane’s thick shroud of silence is beginning to lift. So eager is this boy to please me that I actually need to challenge him to take his own pleasure, to feel deserving of his own joy. His body is toned perfection, restrained power, vacuum-sealed energy. The boy awakens with me on his mind and admits to “feelings.” That’s enough for now. The rest will come in due time.

Time. A topic worthy of reflection with my beet salad and pinot. Eight days into our thirty-day trial period. Not to get ahead of myself here, but it seems as though we’re heading toward a more permanent arrangement. What that might be, frankly, scares me.

I’m the rare dom who has never offered a collar. I’ve endured my friends’ teasing, calling me “old-fashioned”—sure, an old-fashioned kinky bastard who trains submissives for a living. I’ve wondered as they’ve wondered: Am I commitment-phobic? Am I destined to live out my life with an unending (God willing!) stream of submissives who matter to me in my dungeon but not beyond?

Could Dane be my first? Fuck, Marcus, now you’re a virgin?



“Sir, may I take your plate?”

“What? Oh, yeah . . . sorry.”

The waiter chuckles as I shift out of his way, careful to grasp the stem of my wine glass so he doesn’t bump it with my Tuna Provençal. The last thing I need is a big red wine stain on my gray slacks.

“Do you have everything you need, sir?”

I think I might.

The waiter smiles at his imbecile patron, bringing three things into clear view. First, the guy is drop-dead gorgeous; second, he is clearly flirting with me; and finally, I noticed neither of these details until just now. Damn good thing I won’t be called on to operate any heavy machinery today.

“I’m all set for now, thanks.”

“Okay, then. Enjoy.”

Mmm, I plan to.

Hmm, stalkerish? What do we think of Marcus spying on his boy? Can you blame him? Who wouldn't be in that theater every damn day?


  1. There was no way he could last 5 days..LOL! I loove that he went to see Dane in his own element. Poor Marcus was all hot and bothered. I was soo giggling at him.
    And whaaaaaaaaaaaat??? Marcus has never collared anyone????? Did we not know that? or How did I miss this???? Eeeeee! No wonder he is freaking out a bit!
    But, I love it. And the fact that he didn't even notice the hot boy flirting with him. Swwooooon!
    xoxo <3

    1. Clearly! Nope, no collars for our guy. Never had anyone worthy of his commitment, I suppose.

  2. Lucky me, two chapters in one day.
    Sneaky Marcus going to spy on his boy and tempted enough to move closer for the evening performance, perhaps Dane will spot him.

    Marcus' reply email was just right, enough was said to put Dane's mind at ease but not too much to be pressurising.

    And the collaring, well I can't wait for you to explore that subject.

    Thank you


  3. I prefer "doing research" to "stalkerish". Haha! Then again my husband calls me a stalker so I don't think I'm a good judge.

  4. aww, I did think that 5 days was a long time for them to not see each other. I love how excited Marcus was to see Dane in his zone. His excitement was infectious!

    I could totally relate to M when he was thinking he felt like the spotlight was on him, and how he felt exposesd by his reaction to D and his dancing. Who hasn't felt that way- scared that the strength of your emotions will expose you in some way??

    Interesting tidbit that Marcus has never collared anyone. I can totally picture that while he has spent his time earning a living by training subs, but how long has he been doing that for work? I wouldve guessed maybe he had some more committed relationships before he got into training others. Hmm, very interesting. :)

    1. I love your reflections on Marcus and the spotlight! Thanks for sharing.

      More on Marcus's past...thanks for your curiosity! :)

    2. I hope that Dane doesn't see him, but rather he heard him laughing at some point. Then he can smile knowing his Master is always with him. Or he's left wondering if he just has an overactive imagination. But either way, Marcus wins because he's in Dane's thoughts; which is where a Master needs to be in order to succeed.

    3. Very intriguing idea you have there...almost a subliminal insertion of his Master's being into the submissive's head? Hmmm.

    4. I have to totally agree with this review. Not sure it could have been stated any better.


  5. CreeperMacus is sorta really cute. I love his consideration for Dane's work. Not showing himself because he's nearly positive, as are we at this point I think, that it would throw Dane off balance and affect his last show. This man just....he's the best of what men have to offer.

    Favorite line... Please, God, don’t let him play Halo. ...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA!


    1. Ah, a creeper only my readers would love!

      Funny you picked the halo line! LOL

  6. My 2 favorite lines: "Please, God, don’t let him play Halo." lol

    "His body is toned perfection, restrained power, vacuum-sealed energy." And you want all that energy to yourself, son't you Marcus? Why don't you request a command performance?

    I can't decide if I want Dane to see MArcus at the very end or not. Isn't row M about15 rows back? I don't think there's any danger of Dane spotting him during the performance, but perhaps during the standing ovation at the end?

    1. Why don't you request a command performance?--------------THAT is a great question. I'm not answering it.

      AHHHHHHHHH. PERHAPS! *winkety wink wink*

  7. Nothing wrong with Marcus enjoying Dane's talents. All of them. LOL I do like that Marcus is as smitten with Dane as a schoolgirl with her first crush though fully realizing that it goes deeper than that. At least, I hope it does for Marcus.

    Was cracking up laughing at the audience's responses at Marcus' actions while watching the play. And how Marcus fully realized that he was being inappropriate but just didn't care. LOL He is a smitten kitten for sure!

    1. Yeah I didn't think the schoolgirl metaphor was particularly macho but that's just how helpless we all feel sucked under by the power of this force!

      I may have based the inappropriateness of Marcus's responses on my own adventures as an audience member. I was awful watching Breaking Dawn- sighing and screaming and squealing...and in Divergent when Four asks if she wants to see his tatt, I might have yelled out, "YES PLEASE!" Whoops.

  8. that, all those feelings are about to explode out of him. His journey is just as wild as Danes is. So much fun to watch such a cocksure man stumble just a bit when it comes to his own emotions. Really loved him not realizing the cute waiter flirting with him.

    1. Ohhh, vulnerable Marcus is SO MUCH FUN to write!
      Thanks for enjoying it!

  9. I was wondering when Marcus would get to see his boy dance in a show. I wonder if he'll tell Dane? great chapter :)

  10. Vacuum sealed energy. How do I get some?

    Marcus wants more back story. Me too! (jumping up and down).

  11. Hmmm... and the wheels are turning in my head. And knowing that I probably have the answers to my questions in my inbox from you is all sorts of ironic. But I'm not a cheater - I need to read through every delicious chapter again before I get to the new stuff. What does Marcus have for family? Are they close, still around? While we know about Marcus and Edward's relationship (floats off the lala land reminiscing) what about his other friends - like those he spent NYE with? What do they know of his lifestyle and current work? And now I'm done with the rhetorical questions...
    I love how zeroed in Marcus is to Dane , barely even registering anyone else was on stage with him. This smitten kitten :-)

    1. You totally have the answers.
      Thanks for this.

  12. AHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA OMG I just reviewed the last chapter asking when Marc would go see Dane dance and BOOM... this chapter happened!!!! I was actually looking forward to him doing this and he's right. There's so very little he knows about Dane's life away from him. Their relationship is getting so much more up in air too, and there's so much confusion on both their parts on where this is/ can go.

    'Fuck you, people. You see that boy right there? He’s MINE! If you knew him as I know him, you’d be squirming and sweating and . . . hardening.' <<<< fucking love that. Haha a a a. The bastard was so hot and bothered. Not that I blame him. I bet someone would have Dane dancing again for him real soon!

    1. BOOM! Mayyyybe! ;) But then again, Marcus is going back for the 8 pm show! ;)

  13. i love that marcus is checking dane out in his element. it's a great in-sight into the boy and his world. i really love how possessive marcus was! his boy indeed! not to mention how hot and bothered marcus was. it was so cute how marcus bought a ticket for the next performance right after the show. if he was so distracted after the first show that he didn't even notice a hot guy flirting with him, i can just imagine how distracted he'll be after having an even better view of dane. :D

    wow, i was so surprised that marcus has never collared any one! it's interesting that in all the training that he's done that he has never felt compelled to be so committed.

    and i just love their emails! especially how eloquently they're written, by both men. :) x

    1. Oh these guys just love words! LOL I always saw Marcus as an elegant man (in KEA, I mean, not in Twilight!) and Dane is a quick study. He's more careful and measured in his trained responses, but I wanted him to be articulate as well. You can see the contrast between Dane and a couple other men he fell for. :) THanks for your sweet comments, Jodie!