Tuesday, July 22, 2014


“I’m ready to get back out there.”

“Not yet, Dane. Edward and Aro need a solid fifteen minutes to finish the binding and suspension.”

Dane is hopping from side to side like a prizefighter before a big bout: rolling his shoulders, cracking his neck, darting his eyes around the room as if hunting for an escape route. And shame on me, my mind should be elsewhere, but goddamn, Dane looks hot in his “apprentice” apparel—snug black pants over heavy black combat boots, and of course, the designer T-shirt in my favorite shade, Dane-ish blue.  

“Riley did a great job on your outfit.” I step into his body, knocking knees and bumping thighs. Dane instantly stills as his Master brushes a thumb along the collar. “The v-neck was a great touch. It doesn’t just look great on you; it really makes your collar stand out—or what is it they say, makes it ‘pop’?”

MINE, MINE, MINE. Yeah, I am so leaving the collar on him.

Dane’s Adam’s apple bobs as he takes a heavy swallow. “Thank you, Master.”

“Now that I have your attention . . .” We both smile at the ludicrous thought I’d ever not have his full attention.

“Yes, Master?”

Those lips need to be kissed—and now. Dane’s eyelids droop shut as I close in over his mouth. The kiss is life-affirming, but it wasn’t really why I needed his attention, and I pull back ever-so-reluctantly, my hands skimming down his arms and coming to a stop around his wrists.

“You’re not sore anywhere, are you?”

He delivers a “Nope” with a little grin.

Twinkle, twinkle, little sass. You go right ahead with that, Dane. Nothing could please me more right now.

Just in case I hadn’t noticed his enthusiasm, he adds, “I’m all warmed up and stretched out and ready for action.”

“I know, Dane. You’re like a giant, human spring, all coiled up and about to explode. I’m almost afraid to see what happens when I open that door.”

“I can manage it. Promise.”

“Of course you can. You do it every night, don’t you?”

He nods, and there’s a glimmer of contentment shining through when he answers because he knows I appreciate exactly who he is. “I do.”

“Mmhmm, and what about this, Dane?” I ask, rubbing my groin against the erection I felt earlier. “Is this ready for action, too?”

“Sorry, Master. I can’t help myself around you.”

“That’s not a problem for me.” To illustrate my okayness with the situation, I grab his hips with both hands and yank him against me.


Dane stops breathing. His eyes are riveted to mine.

What are you up to, boy?

This time, in slow motion, with the precision of a nuclear physicist, I grasp Dane’s hips and tug him to my body in short, experimental bursts. He knows better than to resist, now that I’m hot on the trail.

Pop! Pop! SQUEAK!

Locked together in pre-tango position, I close in again . . . right there. SQUEEEEEAK!

“Hmm, and here I thought you were happy to see me.”

“I was . . . I am. Okay, I was saving this for out there . . .” Dane reaches into his front pocket, retracts a small plastic Tweety Bird, and gives the thing a squeeze. SQUEAK!

“Oh, Dane.”

“You don’t mind, do you?”

“Mind? It’s brilliant! When did you get that?”

“I stopped by the Disney store yesterday afternoon.”

“With Sean?”

“No. He wouldn’t have understood the reference.”

“Okay, I wasn’t sure how much you’ve told him.”

“I haven’t told anyone that . . . until you.”

I can’t help the happy dance taking place inside me. “Well then, I have just one question for you.”

“What’s that?”

“Should we break the squeaker before you give it to him?”

Dane’s grin spreads into a slow smile. “Oh, Master, you bad, old puddy-tat!”

“I’m gonna let that ‘old’ comment slide because this is just way too much fun.”

“Thank you, Master. I appreciate that.” He pushes the toy back into his pocket, one more demon sent packing.

Which still leaves one crucial question unanswered.

And this is not the time to ask.

Not asking doesn’t make the issue go away; it just straps an oxygen tank to the problem so it can dive deeper.

I suppose . . .

He sees the question in your eyes. Just ask him.

“Listen, Dane, you don’t have to answer if this isn’t comfortable.”

Dane stiffens, the boxer preparing to take a blow to the midsection. “Okay?”

Out with it already. This is cruel.

“How’s your heart doing?”

“Oh, that.” Dane looks over my shoulder before answering, and for those terrifying seconds, I imagine the worst—he’s looking for the words to tell me he still has feelings for the man strung up on the other side of the door. Or worse—he won’t be able to tell me at all.

I am a fool. This self-inflicted torture was unnecessary and possibly even dangerous. I should have waited.

Damn insecurity!

This time of Dane-waiting is the worst yet, and his response—when it finally comes—doesn’t quell the tornado spinning in my gut.

“Am I a horrible person?”

Oh God.

“No, Dane. Of course not.”

Oh God.

“I just . . . don’t . . .” He shakes his head as his chin sinks toward his chest, a windup toy losing its juice.

Oh God.

I pull Dane against my body and wrap my arms around his back, a gesture he doesn’t return. “It’s okay, Dane. I promise; it’s okay.”

Dear God, please let it be okay.

He presses his mouth against my shoulder, and his words form moist clouds on my shirt. “I don’t feel . . . anything . . . for him. Nothing.Thank you, God. “No attraction, no affection, zero desire to please him. I don’t even hate him . . . it’s all just gone. That’s wrong, isn’t it?”

“No, not wrong, no, sweet boy.” I can’t hold him tightly enough. My arms glide up Dane’s back, one finding a home around his shoulders, the other pulling his face into the bend of my arm. I burrow my face into his hair, breathing him in and kissing random spots of scalp. Tears leak into Dane’s hair as waves of relief threaten to knock me right off my feet.

“This is what healing feels like, Dane. Don’t you see? You’re over him. He can’t hurt you anymore. He has no power over you. You’ve taken it away.”

You have it now, Master.”

“Only because you choose to gift me with it every day. It’s not mine to take. I think you know that now.”

We rock together without words until Dane clears his throat and pulls back. “Sorry I soaked your shirt with my spew.”

“It’s a noun now?” I chuckle as I look down at my chest. It is indeed soaked.

“Maybe you should just take it off.” Mr. Coy.

He’s wiping his eyes furiously with his hands, but there’s a Dane-grin underneath that warms my heart. Oh, what the hell. I reach for the hem of my shirt, and Dane smiles his I-knew-I-would-win smile at me, which of course makes me smile right back as I tug the black cotton over my head.

“You know, Dane, sometimes I think you take advantage . . .” I toss him the shirt so he can mop his face, “. . . of a situation.”

Even with my shirt covering most of his face, crinkles peek out the sides of his cheeks. “Sorry, Master,” he says in the most halfhearted apology ever.

I tug the shirt out of his hands, revealing one big, fat, happy grin. Dane’s tongue slides to the corner of his cheek in an attempt to erase the evidence. Folding my arms across my chest, I go for something stern-ish, but it’s really no use. The best I can do is to threaten him.

“We’ll discuss this later,” I promise, only making him smile even wider.

But then, I see it: that twist at the very end, that subtle little shift from I’ve-got-you-wrapped-around-my-little-finger to Master-won’t-you-please-spank-me. Dane serves it up so beautifully by striking that perfect submissive pose for me and dipping his eyes just the slightest bit below the horizon. To top it all off, there’s a definite rasp in his voice when he answers me.

“I look forward to it, Master.”

And I’m cooked. Just in time to head back out.

“Ready to do this thing, Dane?”

He breaks his pose to reach around front and adjust himself. Yeah, gonna need to buy Riley a little something special for finding those pants.


“Let me remind you once again, we are not in scene. My collar is there to protect you, not to constrict you.”

“Isn’t it always, Master?”

“True, but . . .” Yeah, remarkable. “You’re right, of course, Dane.”

Tongue-tied, I reach for the door knob, only to be halted by Dane’s hand clutching my wrist and the deepest, brownest eyes searching mine.

“I get your meaning. Thank you.”

“’Welcome. Now, how about we get out of here before we miss the whole damn show?” I take Dane’s hand, and we walk out together to the cheers of the crowd.

“That’s for you, Dane. They’re applauding your courage.”

He squeezes my hand and leans in. “Actually, Master, I think it’s because you took your shirt off.”

“Don’t make me blush, Dane. It won’t bode well for you later.”

The boy simply chuckles. “Okay, Master.”

Alas, we’re not entirely surrounded by friends. At center stage, a body jerks and twists in a fruitless struggle. Whatever has happened in our absence has cued Wayne into the fact that this may not be the fantasy he was envisioning when he “volunteered.”

The dungeon feels darker; a definite mood shift has occurred—and not just with the twitching body on stage. Musky sex-den has given way to blood-thirsty Colosseum. With Aro as emperor, I suppose I must be Spartacus. The sorry excuse of a man under the spotlight is no gladiator worthy of sharing the arena with anyone present.

Edward and Aro have performed their job well, replicating Dane’s position with a couple of kinky twists: the aforementioned backward-slung cock and a strategically-placed spreader bar for that added essence of you-are-my-bitch. Meanwhile, the far more dangerous end—that which forms hurtful words—is effectively muzzled by a giant rubber ball gag. Wayne’s vision is unimpeded; we want him to see and hear every detail, and if luck holds, he’ll remember it vividly for a long time to come.

From my vantage point, the details of knots and flesh fade into the strong geometry of the upside-down “v” over the concave arch of Wayne’s body. The familiar shape nags at my subconscious . . . what is that?

Of course! One of Lady Justice’s scales has broken free and traveled to this very dungeon! Wayne hanging from the scale of justice? The irony!

Oh, Wayne, you poor, sick fuck! With Dane on the other side of the scales, you don’t have a prayer when the sentence is delivered.

I’ve tied up no fewer than a hundred men in my day, so the sight of this naked, bound body holds very little shock value for me. Biology and physics joining forces—nothing more, nothing less. While the sexual urges can approach downright evil, the physics are ever improving to keep pace, with angles and materials, weights and teeth. Wayne has been effectively neutralized, and that’s all I care about.

His physique is not remarkable in any way; I can’t even say my revulsion has anything to do with his puffy rings of flesh or the wiry gray hairs angrily broadcasting the man’s apparent disdain for the trimmer. I’ve obviously seen far better, and I’ve just as cheerfully worked with worse. My disgust is entirely based on what I know about Wayne as a person, but the bile pooling in my throat is no less potent for it. 

“Wow.” Dane’s calm, even voice commands my attention. I turn my head to find him staring, slack-jawed, at his former faux-dom. Dane’s boots seem pulled by some irresistible force toward the suspended body; still holding his hand, I’m pulled along.

Catching the look on Dane’s face, Edward’s gaze immediately shifts to mine. 

He’s okay, I answer with a nod. Continue.

Leave it to Aro to move things forward in the most indelicate fashion. Flashing that terrifyingly gleeful smile in our direction, he belts out, “Gentlemen, welcome to the Waynie roast!”

Wayne jerks in his harness and grunts out a muffled appeal, but he can’t quite turn his head enough to see us.

To see Dane.

He’s already gotten more of my boy than he deserves, and it burns me to give him anything further, but it’s all part of the deal. Letting him see—one last time—what he lost. Letting Dane remember the man this way, stripped of his dignity and any last ounce of power Wayne might still hold over him.

Welcome to the Waynie roast!

It seems that every story has its oh-shit moment, where I'm both terrified and thrilled to share my words with my readers. As many of you know, this chapter and the next were two of the most challenging I've written for any story. If you've come this far in the story, you probably have some definite opinions about what should and should not happen next, and I'm fortunate to have heard many of those opinions both here and in private chats. Thank you for caring so much about these characters and for supporting my writing. Thank you also for trusting me to tell my story. 

As always, I do love hearing how the story moves you- even if it's not all rainbows and roses. Your honesty makes me a better writer. xo ~b


  1. Light the fire and let the Waynie Roast begin. A pig roast for sure. Hmmm BBQ, pulled pork...

    1. Yuck. Don't make me think about eating him! :P

  2. oh man.....having this highly anticipated event spread out over several chapters is sweet torture! you are the master (mistress?) of this kind of writing and I love every moment of it! i'm so looking forward to what comes next, whatever it is! Waynie Roast, indeed! bring it on! i'm also so satisfied with how far both Marcus and dane have come in this story, both individually and together. i'm almost blissed out while i read this, and every, chapter. did i tell you how much i love this story??

    1. I wish I could have adequately laid out the scene in fewer chapters, Judy- ideally just one. As I sat down to write, there was so much going on both behind the scenes and out in the audience, I just couldn't short change the telling.Thank you so much for your lovely comments about the characters and their forward movement both individually and together. So wonderful to hear you feel that way. xoxo

  3. There it is...the whole point. Dane has the power and he has chosen to give it to Marcus, it has not been taken by some non-dom with no clue how to harness it. Aro had me laughing, Dane did too when he slyly got Marcus to take of the shirt and then told him that ppl were applauding because he was shirtless. The scales of justice tied up in knots was very creative on Edwards (?) part. There was nothing but good this chapter. Loved it. Vicki xoxo
    p.s. the squeaker...oh man, that is going to burn Weinie Waynes arse!

    1. :)
      Yeah, Vicki. It's really all about showing Dane that he holds all the power. I believe he has reached epiphany! *angels singing*

  4. I'm trying to gather all my thoughts here, I will admit to squirming a bit in my chair, I'm never going to be the person who enjoys revenge, who enjoys someone's pain and humiliation but this isn't just about retribution is it? It's about teaching a lesson and hoping that his cruel nature and the damage he does physically, emotionally and sexually is never inflicted on another poor soul. One only has to think about Dane in the beginning of this story and the other unknown subs with their untold horror stories to somehow circle the square. I am sure you will give Wayne just what he deserves. I couldn't hold a whip or cane but I'm still with you in the room.

    In other news ;) Dane and Marcus' interaction amongst all this drama is just to die for, the humour, the lust and the love, if only every dominant was like Marcus, yum, I would even like one myself...

    Thank you Born, for your wonderful writing and taking us all on this journey with you.


    1. J, I truly appreciate your willingness to suspend your boundaries for this story. I can't wait to talk again after I post the next chapter! I think my favorite reviews are always the ones that reveal a reader has moved from where he/she started because of the story. Hold that thought...and let's have at it in the next chapter, shall we?

      Thank you so much for your beautiful and kind words about the story.

  5. Hold my hand guys, I'm speechless. Aro's rudeness, Edward's coldness are the perfect cliff hangers *no pun intended* for this moment.
    What's floating around is the friendship and respect for Marcus AND Dane. What we're about to see is nothing less than justice being served.
    And the emotional banter between Marcus and Dane only shows us how far this relation has come and will go on.
    And if I were you ... I wldn't eat out of that roast, this meat is poisoned!
    *shakes head* I believe you when you say you're thrilled because I know we all are. Is it a challenge? Indeed and yet, I know you'll master it, you'll conquer it. Venite, videti, vincet. Bring it on MoW!

    1. Gorgeous, Muse. Thank you so much for your insights and lovely words.

  6. Eeeeeeeeeep! Let the Waynie Roast begin!!!!!

    Dane bought a squeaker! OMG!!! LOL! I freaking love it! That boy is always surprising me!! :D


    1. He surprises me at least once per chapter, Pates. I thought I should pass it along!

  7. oh - the conversation between Marcus and Dane - so wonderful to witness. Where Wayne had the power once, he doesn't anymore - and not just in the dungeon at this very moment. Dane has come to terms with his feelings - and has moved on - his lack of feeling for his abuser making me do a little fist pump. Hatred can sap every other emotion - can eat anyone alive, and as much as Wayne is about to get roasted, their conversation showed that Dane's not in the place where vengeance is his focus. The way I see it, Dane wants that man gone so he cannot harm anyone else, and THAT is what is important here. To be rid of someone who has poisoned the minds of any poor submissive that's crossed his path. The squeaker made me laugh - oh how far Dane has come. As upset as he was at one point - how he reacted in this interaction with his Master showed he has indeed moved on with his life - and is no longer seeing himself as the victim but rather the victor in this. Loved the way the trussing of that pig was described - and in that moment, I would have LOVED to see inside Dane's head. I imagine that walking into that room, with everyone who cares about him providing their support - well I reckon it would have heartened him no end. And my oh my, lady justice's scales are not tipped in your favor, Wayne! The only thing missing is a little fire and a rotisserie! Then again, we don't want to give anyone indigestion... I will be interested to see how Dane reacts when whatever they have planned to mete out to Wayne is delivered, but something tells me he will take it all in his stride. Thank you so much for sharing this little insight! :)

    1. BITING MY TONGUE SO HARD RIGHT NOW! Thank you, Lisa, for sharing your thoughts on this one. I am so glad you pointed out that for Dane to hate Wayne would be giving the man back his power over Dane (you didn't quite say it that way but I inferred it!) I agree with you on the squeaker issue. It's one symbol of Dane's mastery (if you will) of a previous defeating situation. Each success breeds another. Totally agree with how I would feel if I walked into a room stocked with all my supportive friends (you perhaps!). I am really looking forward to your response to the meting out...same time, same channel! MWAH!

  8. "Twinkle, twinkle, little sass." Ha That describes you pretty well too, yes? These two are just so wonderful together. They just compliment each other in all the right ways. That Dane feels nothing for wayne,.. perfect. Dane has allowed Marcus to fill him with love and joy, allowed others to be his friend. He took a risk in his career. He was strong enough to keep trying. I think that is the definition of strength. When so much else fills you with joy, there just isn't any room for past resentment. Wayne doesn't belong in Dane's light in any way.

    I've had thoughts about revenge vs justice and it came down to this. For a group to stay respected and ethical it must self police. I want doctors to be disgusted by inept or unethical doctors and for them to help get them out of the profession. I expect churches not to protect priests that are pedophiles. This society must do the same. How you are accomplishing this seems in line with the community they are apart of . Kudos

    1. MOI? Sassy? Nah... ;) Love your imagery that M has filled Dane with love and joy leaving no room for all the negative he might otherwise have. Love your thoughts on the self-policing. Seems to me the BDSM community would be the first to nip this in the bud. Even Aro, with all his creepy oddities, would want the highest standards upheld. :)

  9. Such a lovely thing to come home to after a mini-vacation! Dane's progress from where he was at the beginning of the story continues to astound me! He is an amazing man, sub, lover, partner. I really, really enjoyed his and Marcus's time in the private room:the tender moments, and the "sass"ier ones too. lol.

    Good for Dane, not hating Wayne- Who was it that said that the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference? (or was that the other way around? *shrug*)

    I really look forward to D getting what he deserves for 'taking advantage of the situation.' *wink*

    I might have teared up when they came out of the room to applause. Might have.

    I'm a little anxious about what's about to happen, but I have a lot of faith in you, B. I know it'll make sense, etc. One thing I am wondering about though, is who did the manhandling of Waynie's weenie??? yuck! lol hope they were wearing gloves!

    Can't wait to see what happens next. I just know it will blow my mind!

    1. Thanks for mentioning their time alone together. That was a really important piece for me. It's all about these two men. Wayne has to be neutralized, but beyond that, it's all about how he is not allowed to come between Marcus and Dane, not allowed to take away any of Dane's forward movement. You're so right about the indifference. Hate is no good for anyone. I read somewhere it's like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

      Aww, sweet Dig, thanks for your tears.
      So glad you wondered about the waynie weenie...and by now, you have your answer.
      Thank you for your wonderful insights and great questions!

  10. I've decided to dedicate this morning to Marcus and Dane since the hubby had to work today. I didn't realize how much I've really missed and anticipated the rest of this story until I delved right back in.

    The connection that Marcus and Dane have is so strong and sweet... and HOT.
    And the Waynie roast? Bawhahaha Perfect

    1. Oh hello, Meredith! I must've accidentally missed this one.

  11. *steps up to the waynie roast and pokes it with a fire poker* YOU ABOUT TO GET BURNED MOTHER FUCKER!!!!

    Love that Dane was itching to get back out there. He's holding on way better than I thought or gave him credit for. He continues to astound. Also him telling Marcus that he feels nothing for Wayne... not pity or disdain or repulsion or emotion was the best gift that he could have given his Master tonight. Although I wasn't worried, I have to admit I let out a huge breath of relief at that one.

    and PEEING MY PANTS at the rubber duckie. FUCKING CLASSIC DANE!!!!

    1. heehee, the rubber duckie might have been a wee bit Jayme too! Glad you enjoyed. Yes, Dane's healing is largely due to Marcus, and now- as you say- Dane's lack of any feeling toward Wayne is Dane's true gift to Marcus. YAY!